AN INTERVIEW WITH TROLLS RIGHTS ACTIVIST – LOGIC LAUGHS

 

Ladies and/or gentlemen and people of all color welcome to the show,

we have a very special guest with us tonight… he is a very popular trolls rights activist, novelist and local singer… erm, he is the voice behind the hashtag #TrollsUnite and the founder of the Society for the Advancement of Trolling Rights Everywhere – #SATIRE please give a warm welcome to Logic Laughs.

 

 

Logic Laughs:  Thank you all, It’s great to be here

       Interviewer:  It’s great to have you here on the show Logic, can I call you Logic?

Logic Laughs:  Of course you can. I’m a very nice person. *CROSSES LEGS*

Interviewer:  I’m just going to get off the bat here, erm, because we’re all dying to hear your story… What inspired you to be a trolls rights activist?

Logic Laughs:  Thank you Oprah, I get that question a lot. I remember the first time I was called a Troll. I was posting some random tweets, you know on the website, Twitter?

     Interviewer:  mm hmm

Logic Laughs:  and out of the blue someone replies one of my tweets and tells me to “stop trolling”

     Interviewer:  They told you to “stop trolling”?

Logic Laughs:  *SIGHS* Yes

     Interviewer:  Terrible

Logic Laughs:  now obviously I didn’t know what trolling meant at the time

     Interviewer:  mm hmm

Logic Laughs:  so I typed in “trolling” into google search, and before I could finish typing,   some google suggestions started to appear

     Interviewer:  What kinds of suggestions?

Logic Laughs:  Like “I hate trolls” “Trolls are disgusting” “Trolls are the devil” stuff like that.

 

     Interviewer:  Just awful

Logic Laughs:  What’s even worse is that, I finally hit search, and there were all these…    depictions of trolls as monsters, trolls as computer geeks and stuff…

….Even in movies, like there’s this one movie where a troll walks into a girl’s    bathroom and tries to attack her –

     Interviewer:  What movie was that?

Logic Laughs:  Harry Potter, I think it was called

*AUDIENCE GASPS*

Logic Laughs:  and I remember thinking, how could anyone film something like this? A   troll would never attack anyone, much less a child, but they had us  attacking little girls in bathrooms.

     Interviewer:  It must have been an awful experience for you.

Logic Laughs:  *IN TEARS* It was.

     Interviewer: So what happened next?

Logic Laughs:  So I decided that I wasn’t going to take it anymore

*AUDIENCE CLAPS*

 

I decided that I would go out and do something about it you know. We trolls are as valid contributors to the society as any other person out there, I mean you can find us on, on Reddit forums, you can find us on Youtube comment sections, iMDb message boards, back seats of stadiums – we have a right to exist as much as anyone else.

 

 

     Interviewer:  A very, very brave story. Erm… we have a caller for Logic on the line from   Boston, she is a mother of two and her name is Andrea. How are you  Andrea?

Andrea:  Great. It’s so great to be able to call in and talk to Logic Laughs, he has been an inspiration to me and my family in a big way.

     Logic Laughs:  Thank you. Glad to be of service.

Andrea:  My son recently went to school dressed like a Kardashian, and the other children actually mocked him for it

     Logic Laughs:  They mocked him?

Andrea:  I mean why can’t my son have a normal life like other kids without being vilified for it?

     Logic Laughs:  You see this is exactly what I’m talking about. This is why I fight hard everyday for #SATIRE. We need to stop the oppression of trolls. It’s ridiculous. I see no reason why a creative young man cant dress up as –   which Kardashian was that Andrea?

Andrea:  Kanye

     Logic Laughs:  – I mean it’s absolutely atrocious, don’t you think so Oprah?

Interviewer:  Stop calling me Oprah

     Logic Laughs:  – I see no reason why these people should choose to accost us just because they feel threatened by us. It’s absolutely ridiculous.

This is why as the founder of SATIRE, I am calling for the boycott of all  Harry Potter movies, Warcraft video games, lord of the Rings T-shirts and English dictionaries worldwide.

*AUDIENCE CHEERS*

Interviewer:  A very brave erm… statement. Alright before we end this segment I have a final question that I feel needs to be asked. What can ordinary citizens do to advance trolling rights?

     Logic Laughs:  It’s very simple. The key word here is tolerance, and knowing that trolls are people just like you. When you see us on your timeline or in the street, welcome us , don’t block us.

Interviewer:  So, stop blocking trolls?

     Logic Laughs:  Exactly, and there’s another technique I think might be useful

Interviewer:  Oh yea? What’s that?

     Logic Laughs:  Whenever you see a troll, you could open your mouth at them, and let some sounds come out of it.

Interviewer:  You mean like a cough?

      Logic Laughs:  Laughter, I meant laughter.

*AUDIENCE LAUGHS*

Interviewer:  Of course, well it’s been great having you on the show Logic and we hope to have you again soon.

     Logic Laughs:  Thanks for having me. It was great to be here *Adjusts Crocs*

Interviewer:  Alright, next on the show we have an interview with the leader of #STD – the Society for The Decaricaturisation of Donald Trump . Don’t touch that dial, we’ll be right back

*AUDIENCE CLAPS*

 

 

PS. My name is OB Keeng. I’m a Creative Writer and Musician. This is where I share my weird thoughts with the world.