Ladies and/or gentlemen and people of all color welcome to the show,
we have a very special guest with us tonight… he is a very popular trolls rights activist, novelist and local singer… erm, he is the voice behind the hashtag #TrollsUnite and the founder of the Society for the Advancement of Trolling Rights Everywhere – #SATIRE please give a warm welcome to Logic Laughs.
Logic Laughs: Thank you all, It’s great to be here
Interviewer: It’s great to have you here on the show Logic, can I call you Logic?
Logic Laughs: Of course you can. I’m a very nice person. *CROSSES LEGS*
Interviewer: I’m just going to get off the bat here, erm, because we’re all dying to hear your story… What inspired you to be a trolls rights activist?
Logic Laughs: Thank you Oprah, I get that question a lot. I remember the first time I was called a Troll. I was posting some random tweets, you know on the website, Twitter?
Interviewer: mm hmm
Logic Laughs: and out of the blue someone replies one of my tweets and tells me to “stop trolling”
Interviewer: They told you to “stop trolling”?
Logic Laughs: *SIGHS* Yes
Logic Laughs: now obviously I didn’t know what trolling meant at the time
Interviewer: mm hmm
Logic Laughs: so I typed in “trolling” into google search, and before I could finish typing, some google suggestions started to appear
Interviewer: What kinds of suggestions?
Logic Laughs: Like “I hate trolls” “Trolls are disgusting” “Trolls are the devil” stuff like that.
Interviewer: Just awful
Logic Laughs: What’s even worse is that, I finally hit search, and there were all these… depictions of trolls as monsters, trolls as computer geeks and stuff…
….Even in movies, like there’s this one movie where a troll walks into a girl’s bathroom and tries to attack her –
Interviewer: What movie was that?
Logic Laughs: Harry Potter, I think it was called
Logic Laughs: and I remember thinking, how could anyone film something like this? A troll would never attack anyone, much less a child, but they had us attacking little girls in bathrooms.
Interviewer: It must have been an awful experience for you.
Logic Laughs: *IN TEARS* It was.
Interviewer: So what happened next?
Logic Laughs: So I decided that I wasn’t going to take it anymore
I decided that I would go out and do something about it you know. We trolls are as valid contributors to the society as any other person out there, I mean you can find us on, on Reddit forums, you can find us on Youtube comment sections, iMDb message boards, back seats of stadiums – we have a right to exist as much as anyone else.
Interviewer: A very, very brave story. Erm… we have a caller for Logic on the line from Boston, she is a mother of two and her name is Andrea. How are you Andrea?
Andrea: Great. It’s so great to be able to call in and talk to Logic Laughs, he has been an inspiration to me and my family in a big way.
Logic Laughs: Thank you. Glad to be of service.
Andrea: My son recently went to school dressed like a Kardashian, and the other children actually mocked him for it
Logic Laughs: They mocked him?
Andrea: I mean why can’t my son have a normal life like other kids without being vilified for it?
Logic Laughs: You see this is exactly what I’m talking about. This is why I fight hard everyday for #SATIRE. We need to stop the oppression of trolls. It’s ridiculous. I see no reason why a creative young man cant dress up as – which Kardashian was that Andrea?
Logic Laughs: – I mean it’s absolutely atrocious, don’t you think so Oprah?
Interviewer: Stop calling me Oprah
Logic Laughs: – I see no reason why these people should choose to accost us just because they feel threatened by us. It’s absolutely ridiculous.
This is why as the founder of SATIRE, I am calling for the boycott of all Harry Potter movies, Warcraft video games, lord of the Rings T-shirts and English dictionaries worldwide.
Interviewer: A very brave erm… statement. Alright before we end this segment I have a final question that I feel needs to be asked. What can ordinary citizens do to advance trolling rights?
Logic Laughs: It’s very simple. The key word here is tolerance, and knowing that trolls are people just like you. When you see us on your timeline or in the street, welcome us , don’t block us.
Interviewer: So, stop blocking trolls?
Logic Laughs: Exactly, and there’s another technique I think might be useful
Interviewer: Oh yea? What’s that?
Logic Laughs: Whenever you see a troll, you could open your mouth at them, and let some sounds come out of it.
Interviewer: You mean like a cough?
Logic Laughs: Laughter, I meant laughter.
Interviewer: Of course, well it’s been great having you on the show Logic and we hope to have you again soon.
Logic Laughs: Thanks for having me. It was great to be here *Adjusts Crocs*
Interviewer: Alright, next on the show we have an interview with the leader of #STD – the Society for The Decaricaturisation of Donald Trump . Don’t touch that dial, we’ll be right back